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Old 14th August 2008   #1
P!MP
 
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How to deal with a copper?

Your ideas please? The GF runs into an old school friend and invites him round for coffee. He is married, knows she has a man but still tries his luck. GF kicks him out and is badly shaken up. What do i do? Normally would sort it bloke to bloke but this c*nt is a copper. Tell his wife, key his motor? Your ideas of some nasty revenge please!
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Old 14th August 2008   #2
robin
 
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blackmail.
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Old 14th August 2008   #3
mechanical_vandal
Surely if you do anything criminal then you and your gf are just gonna end up gettin a double load of hassle from the OB. You would have to either do something so anonymous that he wouldnt suspect you ( "pig scum" painted on his garage doors if you know where he lives) or go so open that he daren't come after you (talk to a tabloid newspaper: "top cop turns sleaze" type story).
Or befriend him, get him out to a dodgy strip bar or somewhere similar that a cop wouldnt want to fess up to having been and just suddenly turn from his new best mate into the guy that just bottled him!
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Old 14th August 2008   #4
fred
 
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find him on facebook / friends re-united. post anonymously.

one of my relatives is a copper, biggest womaniser I've ever met. He's asian and a racist too. work that out. something in the culture I guess.
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Old 14th August 2008   #5
fred
 
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actually, FWIW, I'd take her out to dinner, show her some love, let her know she did the right thing. then never mention it again.
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Old 14th August 2008   #6
BringMeMyFix
 
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What fred said, plus find him and cut off his cock.
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Old 14th August 2008   #7
tick.tick.tick
 
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i'd just post about it on here.
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Old 14th August 2008   #8
nimhbus
 
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he tried it on, but was it aggressive or anything?
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Old 14th August 2008   #9
RPM
 
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go to the police station, ask to see him.
explain that you know what happened and demand satisfaction (ie, a duel)

it's got nothing to do with the police, he would be breaking the law too so he's hardly likely to try and do you for assault like he would if you ambushed him with a cricket bat.

the only downside being that you might lose, in this case get the hardest most pig hating mf you know to act as your second.
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Old 14th August 2008   #10
Constantly Perplexed
Hi,

I'd forget it.
We all have these urges from time to time, and i know i for one have miss read a few situations in the past. I'm no angel. If you react who says it wont come back at you 10 fold. She's with you, she told you about it... you win.

CP
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Old 14th August 2008   #11
Dylan
 
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tell his wife, make his friends know.
That will hurt more than anything, his reputation.
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Old 14th August 2008   #12
emoxfag
 
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if he has a front yard, pour bleach on his gras and spell out "child molester"
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Old 14th August 2008   #13
Archi Pelago
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fred View Post
actually, FWIW, I'd take her out to dinner, show her some love, let her know she did the right thing. then never mention it again.
+1

You win, without even doing anything to him!
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Old 14th August 2008   #14
whatfriends
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by emoxfag View Post
if he has a front yard, pour bleach on his gras and spell out "child molester"

dunno if thats a joke. but that shit aint funny.


what do you want to do about it? i dont know if that matters... what does your lady want to do about it? if she wants it left, then leave it. if not, then discuss it with her, not us lot. she is the one to be listened to on something like this. it seems to me that women dont trust men, and often with good reason. be a good man that can be trusted, and don't go all sneaky revenge cos it might not get the good reaction you wanted when she finds out. basically, treat her right and show that you aren't the same as the rest. ( the rest in this case being the ones referred to in the oft said phrase "all guys are the same".. we know it aint true, show it aint true).
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Old 14th August 2008   #15
tom.
Surely you find your most handsome, charming friend and get them to bang his wife? Live by the sword of infidelity, etc.
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Old 14th August 2008   #16
Ramon
Don't mess with policemen, unless you are very serious, and even then...
Write it off, it is a pisser but these things happen.
It could have been a lot worse, your gf's word against a policemans.
Tell your gf never to invite the police into your home again.
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Old 14th August 2008   #17
chris crash
 
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shoot him, in the back, when he is off duty. walk up behind him on the street, put the gun a few inches from the base of his scull, pull trigger. shows your hard.
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Old 14th August 2008   #18
mechanical_vandal
Quote:
Originally Posted by chris crash View Post
shoot him, in the back, when he is off duty. walk up behind him on the street, put the gun a few inches from the base of his scull, pull trigger. shows your hard.
Actually... seeing as he obv had it in mind that he was gonna try it on with your missus, he probably told his missus he was off down the gym/pub/donut shop so noone but your gf, him and you know he was at your house so if you off him you shouldnt crop up as a suspect.
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Old 15th August 2008   #19
P!MP
 
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Thanks for the input guys. She is shaken up but unharmed, its just grates that theres blokes out there like this. As things stand I think I am gonna leave it for a while, I know more or less where he lives. Think I will visit in the early hours in a month or two with some Nitro Mors. Simple, quick and silent. She wants some revenge too even though she thinks she was rather nieve with the whole situation. And she has learnt not to trust everyone at face value. Dinner out and a romantic night in as someone suggested, cheers.
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Old 15th August 2008   #20
Buffalo Bill
 
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Guy is a loser. Why waste any more time on him?
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Old 15th August 2008   #21
BringMeMyFix
 
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Exactly - just cut off his cock and be done with it.
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Old 15th August 2008   #22
Elguapo
 
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Just curse the guy with constant public diarrhea! Next time either of you see the guy just point at him with a big friendly smile on your face and say "Hey man, Diarreha"! He wont have a clue what your talking about, Oh, but you will, You Will! (Evil Laugh) Hahahahahah
ahahahahahahahahahahahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 15th August 2008   #23
benanza
 
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Hey Pimp, tough break man. I'm with the general consensus here, forget about it and move on. It sucks for sure but the potential shitstorm that would come from kicking his lungs out really isn't worth it.

If revenge is key then serve it cold, a prick of his magnitude probably pisses a lot of people off, leave it a while and he'll be searching a long list trying to work out who did it. That in itself will fuck him up more than a beating.
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Old 15th August 2008   #24
VanUden
 
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'If' you and your gf want him to get some sort of comeback for what was totally inappropriate behaviour the single, simplest, thing you can both do is for your gf to tell his wife what happened.
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Old 15th August 2008   #25
Pistanator
 
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Just smack the cunt(make sure he's not in his uniform though) and tell him if he comes near your Mrs again you'll tell everyone at his nick that he's a sexpest and also threaten to tell his Mrs

I fuckin HATE coppers!
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Old 15th August 2008   #26
Skully
 
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ironic that your nickname is P!MP
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Old 15th August 2008   #27
Jim Jones
 
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As others have said don't leave any sleep over the cunt, move on.

But if you're worried about matey doing it again, make a complaint, not with revenge as a motive but just to stop someone else suffering the same fate. http://www.ipcc.gov.uk/

...or you could just mail the cunt some dogshit.
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Old 15th August 2008   #28
picco
send his wife an invitation for tea round at your place but request she leaves her sexpest of a husband at home
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Old 15th August 2008   #29
Skully
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by picco View Post
send his wife an invitation for oral sex round at your place but request she leaves her sexpest of a husband at home
better
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Old 15th August 2008   #30
picco
oral sex better than tea? ppffff
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Old 15th August 2008   #31
Greasy Slag
 
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Back of the net!
You have just gone up on the man scale and you woman is glad she has got one of the good ones. Take her out for a nice meal and back to the love nest for some Cops and robbers role play
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Old 15th August 2008   #32
Greasy Slag
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by picco View Post
oral sex better than tea? ppffff
can't dunk biscuits in ... mmmm hang on...
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Old 15th August 2008   #33
pj (pj)
yeah, cut his cock off, stick it in his mouth, leave an LGFSS spoke card in his anus. swap out his hands for track ends. dump body outside police station.

the forum is based in mongolia so you can't be prosecuted.
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Old 15th August 2008   #34
Skully
 
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Anyway the forum couldn't be done for what someone chose to do with a spoke card: Ford don't get the ticket when someone parks their focus illegally...
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Old 15th August 2008   #35
tomasito
 
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Your girlfriend has his mobile number / email?

Post a dirty classified advert on gumtree, with an open invitation to head round to his house for mass fetishistic orgy.
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