I was riding down the Old Kent Road, just about to turn the corner which leads up to New Cross at around ten to eight tonight.

There were cars parked along the side of the road so I was about to pull out into the middle of the two lane road, I looked over my shoulder to check that my way was clear.
A red and white motorbike was coming up behind me at speed, and did not register my presence in any way- he would have clipped my side if I had not braked and moved to the left.
He was stopped at traffic lights further along the road when I pulled up to his left.
I said “could you look next time?”
He said “what!”
I said “you almost hit me”
He said “look at you on your piece of shit!” Whilst we both pulled away.
Then he drove directly at me, cutting across my front as I braked sharply and pulled to the left.
He was very deliberately trying to force me into the pavement or the back of a parked car.
This happened two more times as I tried to get going again- although I will admit I was calling him a cunt by the third time.
He then sped off.
I tried to catch up with him, but my legs vs. a 650cc+ did not make it happen.


Red and white large capacity motorbike, LY07UVR.

The title of the post sounds accurate man :(
Will keep an eye out.

let's start a motorcyclist-lynching. we'll just grab a random one, to show them we mean business.

what a tit.

I could give you the 999 call details if you were worried about it being a random accusation?

CAD 8309 if you want them.

be careful

there are some proper lawless mo-fos using big bikes out there.

no license, no insurance and no particular benevolence to other road users, I've seen cunts wheelying through red lights with no crash helmets on 1100CC superbikes!

Keep 'em peeled

I find going on about someones small penis and inability to satisfy ones sexual partner a much better way of insulting people. It's far more personal than a general cunt insult and results in a much better reaction.

yeah we'd better just get a small one on a vespa.... don't want to bite off more than we can handle...

I tend to lose my Oscar Wilde like repartee whilst trying not to eat tarmac unfortunately.
Regrettable I know, I shall spend the rest of the evening thinking of better comebacks.

the fellas I'm talking about are probably quite happy to pull a shooter and blow you away

they don't ride vespas though, do they? i may have to reassess this carefully-conceived retaliatory plot to kidnap and brutally kill a random vespa rider...

Is that a sex thing?

maybe it's a necrophilia thing?

perhaps they shoot you dead, then skullfuck your empty eye sockets..

the kinky fuckers

'shooter'

gosh, it's all very 'southern london', isn't it. i think i saw something similar on a guy ritchie film once

I had a run in with a guy in a red beemer in Brixton...after I called him a fat wanker, he said he was gonna go home to get his gun, so I offered to wait...

I saw a man get his shotgun from the boot of his car outside the dogstar a few years back, he was getting quite jittery and was threatening his associate with it.

I decided to make like a banana: split.

A student told me he was going to "snuff me out" when I worked in the library.

I laughed and said, "oooooh, like a candle."

He said, "what the fuck are you talking about - candles?"

It really annoys me when people use death threats that they don't even understand.

i had no idea library life could be so dangerous - what did you do to incurr his wrath?

BMMF is a real nazi about the dewey decimal system.

I love the fact that if the owner of this bike (or any future owners) type the numberplate reg into google they'll get this thread. The more abusive the thread title the better... keep it up.

Calmed down a bit now, just pissed off that he saw the need to try to assert his "authority" on the road after I had pointed out that he might want to watch where he was going.

He is clearly suffering from having a microscopic penis with which he cannot satisfy any woman, or man, or animal come to that.

Hopefully he will finally get his comeuppance whilst OD'ing on erectile dysfunction drugs and cheap retsina.

Fuck him. As you said he's probably got a microscopic penis and is trying to make up for it in other ways. Rise above it, his walnut whip of a penis will probably get knob rot and fall off.

there's graffitti round my way that says "your dead" instead of "you're dead" it always makes me titter...I used to be the manager of said Brixton establishment...saw quite a few things.

Found some details, bigger bike than I thought=smaller penis.
The enquiry is complete
The vehicle details for LY07 UVR (Honda) are:
Date of Liability 01 07 2009
Date of First Registration 23 07 2007
Year of Manufacture 2007
Cylinder Capacity (cc) 1284CC
CO2 Emissions 0g/Km
Fuel Type Petrol
Export Marker Not Applicable
Vehicle Status Licence
Not Due Vehicle Colour WHITE
Vehicle Type Approval null
The information contained on this page is correct at the time of enquiry.
Vehicle Excise Duty Rate for vehicle
6 Months Rate £36.30
12 Months Rate £66.00

I had a very similar thing this morning.
Was riding in a cycle lane, going past a bus- so no vision as to what would pull into my path, and an absolute cunt of a motorbiker pulls over into the cycle lane- not to stop or anything, but to move past the traffic. I jam on the brakes and give him a mouthful of compliments, and the bastard has the gall to blame me, in a fucking cycle lane.
He starts challenging me to a fight, and riding alongside me, and then trying to make me stop.
eventually i legged it away through heavy traffic, but it was getting to the stage that I was truly worried he was gonna go straight for me.

just goes to show- don't shoot your mouth off, even if you think(know) you're in the right.

but an absolute cunt nonetheless.

Sorry I think I forgot to mention this earlier: LY07 UVR is a complete and utter cunt.
I have heard unsubstantiated rumours that the Honda in question has never been serviced, and has been routinely used for uninsured track days.

That's funny - like people misspelling graffiti :p

There's graffiti round my way that says "If you correct grafiti your a cunt" - it's a real dilemma.

I've had a go at a couple of scooter cunts before. Don't really recall any proper motos getting angry.
Then again most of the moto riders are in the far right and never get near me.

push them over if they get aggro, they hate that

Thought of that- 85 kilos of me plus 7 kilos of bike vs 80 kilos of him plus 180 kilos of bike.

I clearly need to swig HTFU and go for it next time I see him.

I am ashamed of my girlish ways.



EDIT: no idea what motorbikes weigh, seemed reasonable as an estimate

When I worked in the job centre I had to tell this maniac his giro had been cancelled.
He told me if he didn't get it he would cut me up into small pieces and send me home in bin liners to my mother. I told him he was a cunt and he should get a job.

Next thing I knew, he had me pinned against the wall by my neck and was pretty much about to kill me. Luckily there were some equally crazy people working there so it all ended reasonably peacefully.

But yeah there are some nutters out there